Thursday, July 19, 2007

I really shouldn’t laugh. I realize that the whole unfortunate incident was and is not a laughing matter but now that it’s over, I can’t suppress the hysterics. Firstly, traveling has been frequent and touring has been eventful in many and varied ways so I apologize for not submitting an entry in ages. Yes, many events have occurred. Yes, I want to write about them but before I begin, I must report the bizarre and hysterical. There we were in the Istanbul airport getting a coffee and Pip was last in line getting a few things. All of a sudden this huge man commented on how long she was taking. Extremely rude and the quintessential Ugly American he was. Oh brother. You have no idea what he got. She turned around and told him to back off and he wouldn’t so she proceeded to loudly undress him in front of the whole line ending with his itty-bitty teensy weensy penis. Whew. In the heat of the whole affair you began to see the Ugly American male giant shrink and the small American female grow in size and I thought boy, that idiot bully had no idea the tongue lashing in store for him. He just picked on the wrong girl. Other than that, Istanbul was calm. Hagia Sophia and the Blue Mosque holding their secrets within their ancient walls…my mind began to wonder how such complexity can be created with so few tools. The awe these creations inspired is justified. The heat was toasting me a slight brown. I was basking in it. As I am here in Athens, I sat outside with friends at a café tucked away in the hills on the way to the Acropolis. I refuse to think about any problems today, they will all be waiting for me when I take my rose colored glasses off.

32 comments:

Anonymous said...

hey sup???? glad ur having fun on the tour!!!!! u know u guys r like the gold gurls!!!!! {u know the tv show!!!!!} u r rose, santa is blanche, pip is dorothy, and tori and isabel is sophia!!!! u guys act almost like them!!!!! {if u watch the show u'll know what i mean!!!!!} loooooved that pip undressed him and talked 'bout HIS MANHOOD in front of everybody!!!! {lol} glad u r having fun in athens!!!! tell the "gurls" i said hi!!!!
mkgtweety

Anonymous said...

Thanks for checking in with us again Clyde! I was wondering how things were with you out there on tour.

Glad Pip gave that guy a piece of his mind...I'm sick of people who have a lot (whether it be money, size, a degree--I've got a couple but that doesn't make me Queen of the Universe--, etc.) thinking they're automatically better than everyone else and that they can just throw their weight around. Phew.

Anonymous said...

I was just wondering how long it would be before we heard from you again Clyde. I drove to visit my friend that lives just up the hill from Lake Junaluska where Tori was born. I noticed the next town over is named Clyde...I wonder.....I had a few problems with "the man" recently as well. As you know I have been diligently working towards my nursing licence this year, and done so with a 4.0 average. No easy feat as a 36 year old Mother of two kids under 5! I got my letter of acceptance the day I got home from the hospital after delivering Ben--I guess I took it as a sign! Getting up twice a night for feedings for the entire first semester was brutal! Anyways I dug in and somehow made it to a few weeks until graduation and someone in an office somewhere pushes a wrong button and my credits get erased.....I was livid when I got the letter from my school saying i did not have the right credits to graduate. WELL!!!! I had to channel Pip for awhile and get to the bottom of that mess but FAST!!! I am usually in favor of peace instead of fighting but there is no way I could let them get the better of me on that one--all that work to become a nurse erased in seconds!!!!!! anyways, Pip knows I admire her strength....I hope you know how much I admire yours too, although not as obvious, it is true all the same! I LOVE YOU CLYDE!!!!! I LOVE YOU TORI!!!!! Ellen/Lilyscloak

Coke Brown Jr. said...

I have tended to believe that even the ugliest of Americans (and everyone else) have deep-seated reasons for their behavior, and shouldn't necessarily be blamed, but rather hepled, but I am finding out that some people can't be taught to be aware of themselves. They certainly can't be forced. Maybe, though, an ocassional, well-placed dressing-down does get the point across.

I just hope this guy isn't meaner to the next person who's smaller than him due to this animated exchange.

What are we supposed to do with people who don't learn? I love them but am starting to feel more pity than any urge to instruct. :(

Anonymous said...

Brilliant! Sometimes there are people who just need a good dressing down (so to speak), and he sounds like he got what he deserved, good old Pip.
I think we all have a little bit of that girl sometimes, someone inside who can turn around and let loose with all manner of vitriol when we feel we have been violated, either in a verbal, or other, sense. She's healthy, and her anger is justified.
The problems you are avoiding, they will rear their ugly heads eventually, so I'm with you on waiting until you have the time to deal with them.
I know I procrastinated some problems whilst you ladies were in the UK, I pushed it all aside for three glorious days. So thanks for Manchester, and tell Tori thanks for being such a complete star. I'll never forget her kindness and sweetness :)

Have fun in Australia, and don't forget to keep us all in the loop :)

Pam/British Doll

Anonymous said...

Aaah nothing like the sun or the joy blue brings. Blue Mosque. Blue water. Blue peace. Sometimes you gotta retrieve it, good on Pip. Some men just don"t get it. I'm glad the Mayor of St. Louis gets it. No Ike day for you Mr. Turner. Was just talking with a woman at a spa who was visiting from Australia about how I avoid Ugly Americans while traveling. She was waxing euphoric about the joy of Bali and the abundance of feminine energy there from the spiritual practices to the warm humid moist air. Hope you made it to a Hamman to have your brown skin immersed in a more tactile heat. Problems thankfully seem to dissipate in such environments.

Bells for Her

Anonymous said...

Tori wasn't born at Lake Junaluska, but she went to bible school there. She was born in Newton, near Hickory.

I drove by Clyde a couple of days ago too. Wish it had been the person, and not the City.

We hope to see you in NC, Clyde!

Happyleighme said...
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Happyleighme said...
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sibyl said...

Hey Clyde.I missed you.I just wish you could have been in Bucharest.Please, do tell Pip that she was awesome!!!Maybe, just maybe she will honor us with a tiny little post about her day in Bucharest.Thank you!

Anonymous said...

Hi Clyde,

I'm so glad you showed up in Israel and closed the first leg of the tour! Congratulations to all the Posse for a great first leg.

Bells for Her

Anonymous said...

Clyde, thank you for the an AMAZING show last night.

Ido said...

Hey Clyde,
Thank you for showing up for an unforgetable evening in Israel last Saturday. I cant even begin to describe the amazing energy that went through the croud from the minute you walked up on stage.
You truely are one hell of a MILF.

Thank you for being what you are and doing what you do.

Claudia Drake said...

It has been a long time.

Of all the girls, I look
for your posts the most.
You and Santa. Close-tie.
Hope to see you somewhere
along the tour. x

Anonymous said...

Dear Clyde & The Posse:

I think you would appreciate this incredible work of art by Dutch artist Florentijn Hofman. Please, take the time to look at this piece, as I think you'd like it:

http://www.florentijnhofman.nl/index.php?page=projects&id=49

I'm an American girl who was in Amsterdam for the show in June. Tell Pip thank you. Have a safe journey.

Love,
Mary

Happyleighme said...

Is this interaction? Familiar?... Are we begging for entertainment? I think not. This isn’t singing with selective hearing and feeling... though one must be careful - always... walls are good...even if they are transparent - but not in the corners... there aren’t any transparent corners. Where are you standing lately? What have you called us to?

Anonymous said...

Don't let them change ya or even rearrange ya. Could You Be Loved - Bob Marley. Living for today and not tomorrow's satisfaction. Erica is stuck up in a world on her own. Forced to think that hell is a place called home. Run away run away. Running running running running. Don't keep on running away. I know how you feel I been there I was running away too. I will run away with you. Runaway Love - Ludacris and Mary J. Blige. He's a bad man, such a bad bad man. Mr. Bad Man - Tori Amos It's too easy to wish you harm. Smokey Joe - Tori Amos Porcupine, burrow your way to freedom. Posse Bonus - Tori Amos Make this easy, make this easy it's not as heavy as it seems. Bouncing off Clouds - Tori Amos. When I look back over documents and pages ancient savageries christen those inflated. Won't you lay here with me and I will bring kisses for the beast. Lay here with me. Don't tell me a woman did this to you. Dragon - Tori Amos. That one fancies herself as a black lab. You can bring your dog I got three. Please now bring your love! You Can Bring Your Dog - Tori Amos. Tippy Tippy Tie Tippy Tippy Toe. My Posse Can Do - Tori Amos. Instrumental before the first vocal is uttered in By Your Side - Sade.

Bells For Her

Happyleighme said...

Okay - I am reading in the translated version by M.T.H. Sadler - Wassily Kandinsky's work: Concerning the Spiritual in Art... and

"When religion, science and morality are shaken, the two last by the strong hand of Nietzche, and when the outer supports threaten to fall, man turns his gaze from externals in on to himself.

Literature, music, and art are the first and most sensitive spheres in which the spiritual revolution makes itself felt. They reflect the dark picture of the present time and show the importance of what at first was only a little point of light noticed by few and for the great majority non-existent. Perhaps they even grow dark in their turn, but on the other hand they turn ...
away from the soulless life of the present towards those substances and ideas which give free scope to the non-material strivings of the soul."

He then references: Wagner, Debussy, Mussorgsky, Scriabin,and Schonberg.

CRB said...

hahahah! oooh, BURRRRN! see, this is why I like Pip. she's got balls, and I could really learn from her. :D

blackdove said...

I get Pip. I'm from the Philippines and in my country, women and girls have always had to take care of themselves...we are a mean lot too...and fascinating because we are always stuck between survival and heaven, I think...

blackdove said...

Btw...my blog has the same template as this... :)

Happyleighme said...

your music calls, has a calling of its own, of course. i panic sometimes when my course is not clear, i am unsettled when the hoping feels idle. you call your music and your music calls what it calls. i offer apology for my panic. a sidebar thought: i dream of places like www.penland.org, don't you?

as for the hater, i can't say that what they have to say is all too interesting. what is interesting is why they need to hate. if they think they give truth - can they say that they were there? but even i am not really interested in their answer.

and finally, about the ugly american and ugly america... there are cores of ugly that we have yet to hear expressed. not only rudeness in the lines... but corporate americas draining the souls out of willing and commited workers... all over the world.. no place is safe to work. no one really knows if they can really retire.

Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday beautiful One!








Bells For HEr

matías said...

Hi there Clyde. Love to see you around here once again!

Well for Pip, I must say. She really is forceful in her way of asserting her path.

Clyde, dear under-the-pink-and-under-the-ground sweet goddess... I'm afraid I might be insistent, but... Please come to South America sometime!!!!!!!!!!! I've been watching and listening to you and the girls on the internet through the European tour, and I can't help feeling more and more sad at the thought that we won't be able to see you here in Buenos Aires or at any other Southamerican city...

... please consider the possibility. I just can't explain what it means to me and to other people here who LOVE you, the girls, the music, the feeling, the depth.

Kisses, my dear girl

Anonymous said...

oops, my bad....I thought Tori herself said that she was born there at a show I went to in Cary, NC...what a wonderful show...anyways I looked it up and i was wrong. Ellen/Lilyscloak

PS I GRADUATED! (with honors)

Mairead said...

Hi Clyde
Just wondering were you back in Ireland with Tori during your month off?
I wrote you a letter...
Mairead

Happyleighme said...
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Anonymous said...

About Clyde
All works of art start as potential. Similarly, all relationships start as potential. When I meet a person I try and see not their mask, with it’s defenses, but what’s underneath. I get accused of refusing to acknowledge who a person is choosing to be right now. When that person is arrogant or rude or selfish then my friends say, "Clyde!!!!!! THIS is what this LOSER is about." But I say, "Hold on people, this is only what this person THINKS they are about." So this so called Loser person is confused. But if no one sees their potential then they may not ever see it themselves and that would be tragic.

carbon based frequencies said...

rememberances of turkey:

i met a man who made the most beautiful clothes. he looked identical to george harrison. i had to go back and buy three different items just to make sure he wasn't actuall george. i still love and cherish the clothes and can't wait for someone to ask about them.

i went to a nightclub and was there for a good half hour before i realized that i was the only woman in the room that was born that way. incredible. seems sometimes even when you want to make out with a woman, you still get a man.

incidentally,

istanbul once had a problem with people making love on roofs during the sultry evenings, and falling off after dozing off in post coital slumber.

i tried not to think of this as i stood inside the hagia sophia. who would be listening?

did you happen to see the cisterns? a music all its own.

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